All Set for World Records as ‘Wimps’ Pull Out

All Set for World Records as ‘Wimps’ Pull Out

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The Devil's Drop in calmer years

After the wettest April on record the scene is set for world record performances at Carding Mill Valley on Saturday – but without the foreign competition

 Water levels are high and the going is likely to be described as “slick”

 However, the Italian and Egyptian teams have pulled out, claiming the course is too dangerous

“We wannata hava good time, not holda da breath alla da day” said italian team captain Luigi Quackamole, “Dat Devil’s Drop – Ees terrifying!”

“What a load of wimps!” quacked British entry Artful Ducker (number 56)

“I’m hoping to beak the world record this Saturday and you’ve got to be able to quack it in tough conditions if you want to get to the top

 Saturday should fit the bill – I think it will be very eggsciting”

Last year’s races were strategic rather than fast,  with the leaders sometimes becalmed in the final yards

 This year the emphasis will be on speed and balance, with the Devil’s Drop a significant factor

The first race starts at 11

00 and is expected to end seconds later

Last race is at 4

00,  to enable everyone to get back home in time for the Cup Final